If Amerie got it on with a British Boy whilst her classic ‘One Thing’ was providing the soundtrack to a successful fusion of egg and spermatozoa, creating a female embryo imbued with British sensibilities, r’n’b groove and One Thing funk, nineteen years later this is the song such a human would create, ‘Boy’ by ANNE-MARIE. This is r’nb’, it’s funky, it’s vibey, it’s 100% UK. Despite the metaphorical Amerie parentage this is totes British. Fun narrative, cheeky lyrics plus killer chorus. Big tune.

I am really feeling my smooch tracks at the moment, particularly those of a uniquely 2015 slant, contemporary r’n’b, contemp’n’b you could pretentiously call it. ‘Sandra’s Smile’ by BLOOD ORANGE would totally do the business at your school disco / office xmas do, it is an awesomely seductive slab of contemp’n’b that feels very UK, even though Dev now lives in the US (is that a theory falling apart I hear?) Maybe I’ve been corrupted by patriotism but both this and ‘Boy’ sound uniquely British to me. On ‘Sandras Smile’ the chorus is absolutely killer – a homerun, a shoots he scores, a she says yes and gives you her number moment (it’ll also quite possibly help in the securing of said number). The verses waddle along pleasantly enough but the chorus, wowzer, if this was a big RnB star this would be a smash hit. Bit like when Kanye jumped on Estelle (musically) and sent American Boy into the stratosphere, she’s probably still there now living off the royalties on a Vegas meteorite.

Equally sassy, equally British, endowed with RnB overtones but more electronic, now seems a good time to mention SHURA and ‘White Light’. Heard out a couple of times this had become my ‘what the fuck is that’ track, a phrase I had thought shazzam would extinguish, before factoring in how high a percentage of clubs are in reception free basements.